It was another slow afternoon at Premier Estate Buyer Boca Raton when the door exploded open. In marched three men in ski masks, carrying a large, squawking goose.
The employees froze. Was this a robbery? A weird prank?
The tallest masked man pointed at the goose and bellowed, "We demand an appraisal!"
The store manager, Greg, cautiously approached. "Uh… sir, we don’t… appraise livestock?"
"This ain’t no regular goose," the second man hissed. "This is THE Golden Goose."
Greg squinted. "Looks… pretty normal to me."
The third man, who was clearly the dumbest, held up a nugget of pure gold. "See?! It lays these!"
The goose honked violently.
Greg sighed. "Alright, let me get this straight. You’re saying this regular farm goose lays solid gold eggs?"
The leader slammed his hands on the counter. "That’s EXACTLY what we’re saying!"
Greg, now mildly intrigued, picked up the gold nugget and examined it.
"Hmm. 24-karat. Looks real." He turned to the goose, who was currently trying to bite through a Rolex display case.
Then he saw it—the tiny gold flakes stuck to its beak.
"Wait a second…" Greg muttered.
He ran to the security cameras and rewound the footage. What he saw made him facepalm so hard his brain rattled.
The goose hadn’t laid a gold egg. It had EATEN an entire shelf of gold coins from the store across the street.
"You absolute morons," Greg groaned. "This isn’t a magic goose. This is a gold thief with feathers."
The goose, completely unfazed, pooped out a slightly shiny pebble.
The leader ripped off his ski mask. "Damn it, Kevin! I told you this was a bad idea!"
"How was I supposed to know?!" Kevin whined. "I thought we found the next big gold investment!"
Greg sighed. "Look, I’ll call Boca Raton Gold Buyer and see if they wanna appraise… whatever comes out next."
The goose honked.
And with that, history was made.
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